It's all in the mind - what do you do when you feel cross?

Originally published 10 September 2013

Do you ever have those days when you just feel cross?

Last Monday I arrived at work with a dark cloud over my head. I was irritable and irritated. Interruptions and social interactions instead of being welcome just added to my growing sense of crossness. Where had that sense come from? I’d had a lovely weekend and it was a beautiful morning. I’d been able to spend a bit of time with my 5yr old before I headed off to get the London train, snuggling and breathing in his sleepy headed softness.

The train was busy; despite the quiet carriage the noises of tapping keyboards punctuated the 2 hour journey. Gradually the green fields gave way to urban busyness. At Paddington the crowds teamed off the trains. Tickets stuck in barriers drew tuts and intakes of breath. The 20 minute journey across London to the office was filled with fumes, sirens, horns and pneumatic drills.

I was lucky with my first meeting that day; with a colleague I trust, with whom I was able to say, after failing to shift my mood in our meeting room without windows ’can we take our meeting outside?’. And we walked out to a small park and sat in the sun and met there. After a while she said ‘I wonder if you need to think about how you set yourself up on Monday mornings to be in a positive frame?’

And of course, as I write this it becomes obvious. My morning had been filled with a crashing into the world of busyness. How does one set oneself up to transition from one environment to the next in a positive mindset? To appreciate what has just been and prepare for what’s coming next? To appreciate the difference and not carry resentment at loss of what’s just gone?

As always I seem to return to mindfulness. Noticing, being aware and acknowledging what one’s feeling rather than trying to push it down. So this Monday I still kissed the sleepy head and breathed in the warm softness. On the train, I put in my headphones and caught up with the news. I took some Headspace – 20 minute meditation to notice. And then set my mind to the day ahead with a feeling of excitement about what’s to come.

Ah yes, I remind myself. Leading myself is all in my mind.