What does a real servant leader do?

A lesson from my mentor, Laurie Young

Originally published 24 September 2013

Laurie Young, a dear friend, colleague, mentor passed away suddenly last week age just 57. Some people have those souls where they have found who they are and are able to be so generous with others that when they pass even those who didn’t know them feel their loss. Laurie was one of those souls. He was a great thought leader, fascinated by ideas, foraging in history to understand today and the future. He has written many books and shared his insights around the world; he always took time to speak to people – from receptionists to those waiting at table. Went out of his way to thank people and acknowledge them. Each interaction leaving someone feeling a little bit bigger about themselves.

On the day he died, I was a guest of his at the IOD conference; we shared a cab away from the Albert Hall and I dropped him off at Marylebone on the way. In the cab I was asking him about his understated style – he’d just given me a prepublication copy of his Thought Leadership book of which I know he was really proud – and yet he rarely spoke about his achievements without me prompting him. To the extent that at a recent dinner he was asked if he’d ever thought of writing a book (this is his 12th).

He shared this story with me that I thought I’d share on as a memory of him to leave:

'Well, when I think of how I like to be, I think of a particular episode on the Graham Norton show. Bono was on the show and you know they have that red chair where there’s a member of the audience in there telling a story? Where they can be tipped out? Well, there was a guy from Liverpool in the chair and he said he had a story to share about Bono when he was in the same restaurant as him one time in Dublin. Bono covered his face, wondering what was coming next. The man then told how he was in Dublin on honeymoon when they noticed Bono in the restaurant, having a quiet dinner with a friend. The man’s new wife was a massive U2 fan and yet the couple did not want to intrude on what was obviously a quiet, private dinner.

Then, when Bono went to the bathroom, the man approached Bono’s companion and said: ‘I really don’t want to intrude as I know Bono must get interruptions all the time and yet it’s our honeymoon and it would make my wife’s day if she could have a photo with him. Would you mind asking if he’d mind – if not we completely understand.’ When Bono came back, his companion had a word and Bono came over, signed autographs and the companion took photos of the happy couple with their idol. Then they returned to the meal and Bono and his friend left a little while before the couple. When the couple finished their meal and asked for the bill the maître d’ said that the bill had already been taken care of. They were stunned – had Bono also paid for their meal? ‘No sir, Mr Springsteen paid for your meal’. Bono’s ‘companion had been none other than Bruce Springsteen.'

Laurie paused and said that’s how he always wanted to be, focused on what others needed and, like Bruce Springsteen, not needing to make it all about him.

I wonder what stories we’ll leave behind when we pass on?